...is a refedex.

 

It's official :-P

 

Jokes aside, I seriously do need to start learning the streets in the city, though. Driving over to Aoife's house last night, I got Chris and I lost for almost a good hour, I reckon. And in itself, I am fine with that: people get lost all the time, and they arrive late, but it's not the end of the world and you just fit yourself back in where you can. I'm over the actual 'getting lost'. It's more my attitude that annoyed me, because I had been so blase and careless about it beforehand, saying "It's fine, I know my way, it won't be a problem", but when push came to shove, I was so incapable.

 

I can sometimes get emotional when I've let someone down (or even if I think  I've let them down) in some fashion, and this was one of those times, it seems: I spent the night apologising for what happened, and doing what I could to make amends (which, I think in the long run, made little difference). Just being told "It's okay", doesn't fix it for me, either. I've been in too many positions in the past where a silver tongue has let me swallow those words whole-heartedly, only to realise later that their 'kind grace' was completely two-faced. I need to see 'forgiveness' in action before I believe it, or to really sit and talk about it with someone.

 

Ick, look at this, talking about what a bad person I am because I got lost in a car, lol.

But at any rate, I'm okay with it now. It happened, and it was disappointing, but it's in the past and not worth dwelling on, and I hope everyone else feels the same way. Would you believe that apart from that, I still actually had a really good, fun, night? Cross my heart, hope to die, it's true!

 

Looking forward to the dawning of a new day, as always,

Peter

xxx